Don’t Doula It Like Everyone Else!

Apr 9

Transcript
Welcome to Dula Tips and Tits, the podcast where we cut through the noise and get real about what it takes to build a sustainable doula business. I'm Kaylee Harrod. I've been a doula informally for 14 years and full time for seven.
Around here, we don't sugarcoat stuff. We talk autonomy, owning your worth, creating a business that works for you. No fluff, no burnout, just the honest truth on how to be your own best boss. Let's get into today's episode.
Welcome back to Dula Tips and Tits. Today's episode is going to be a shorter one and I want to just start by saying if the audio for the podcast sounds weird, my microphone gave out on me and so I have a new one coming in two days, but until then I did promise you a Wednesday episode.
So here we are. I want to talk a little bit today about doing your own thing and what I mean when I say that is not trying to do a cookie cutter version of a doula company, right? There's not just one right way to do this, which honestly is both absolute magic and overwhelm, right?
Like a kind of like birth and parenting and postpartum. Like wouldn't it be amazing if we could just say this is the right way, right? There's just one way to do this correctly and that now obviously there are some things like you know, safety around car seats and you know how you handle a baby when their neck is super weak still, et cetera, right?
There are some guidelines. There are some safety measures, but there aren't just five steps that every should always do you know and I think in some ways it would be easier if there were five steps to do to make sure you're doing everything correctly and also how incredibly boring like what I mean imagine if we all had the same five steps to like make us into who we are we'd be all exactly the same which is blah like who needs that you know so I think about the absolute magic of working for yourself I think one of the glorious parts of it is that we get to decide what it looks like we get to decide what we even want it to look like and sometimes there's a gap between what it is what we want it to be and like the road between those two things is not super clear so I'm not saying you need to figure this out all out on your own you already know that I do not believe that right But what I am saying is that sometimes I think we use our current imagination of what it can look like to limit ourselves.
Now, today's podcast is in part to set us up for next week's podcast, which is gonna be a guest. I haven't had a guest on in a while. This podcast episode with the guest, I recorded a while back, but it is with a pediatrician who's local to me who does a very different model of pediatric care.
And how she got to that place is a really unique journey. And so that's part of why I wanna talk about this today so that we can be ready for that conversation next week when we're thinking about getting kind of one more idea of what it can look like to do this work.
And I mean, when I did all of the episodes with doulas in 2024, part of my desire there was to highlight how we do it so differently. Like we are actually currently doing it very differently, right? And when we think about that, like that should be something that's really exciting, should be something that's really like validating and vibrant and wonderful.
I mean, if we think about birth, right? We don't, we shouldn't come to birth with the idea that mine is better than yours. Yours was better than mine, right? Now, obviously, if one involved emergencies and one did not, there are some significant changes there, right?
But it's not that one set of choices is inherently and objectively better than another set of choices in terms of birth preferences, right? Whether you listen to slow music or fast music. music, if you're doing hypnosis or like club beats, right?
If you like the water, you don't like the water. You want pressure in your pelvis, you want hip squeezes, etc. or you don't. None of those are inherently right or wrong. Those are all differences and the more we're able to own those differences, the more we can actually lean into the comfort that we need in the midst of birth and delivery and postpartum, right?
The less we judge ourselves for those differences when we just recognize we're all really different. And in business that is also true. Like we do not operate the same. Our businesses don't operate the same.
We as people are not the same. And so taking some time to figure out what this needs to look like for you is vital to your sustainability. We talked on Friday about burnout which is a huge issue in the doula industry and as I was going through that and I said you know I'm putting all the the episodes that we've done on burnout and the show notes which I did I realized I only had like five and I was like I feel like I talk about this all the time but apparently apparently not but here we are so look forward to a few more burnout episodes because it is a topic that matters so much in terms of sustainability longevity the actual length and success of your business right even success like even that word how we define it is so different person to person like what does success look like for you what do you want this birth business to be and it would in some ways be easier if I could just say okay friend you need to do x y z that is what your birth business needs from you and there are some things like that like I can say okay you know you you need to do marketing in more robust diverse ways if you're not currently doing that that's a necessary piece right how you do that and with whom you do that what that looks like for you there's not just one way right but the marketing piece itself needs to happen so yes there are generalized things that we all need to do generalize things that we all need to be focused on and prioritizing however the nuance of those things is very individual and that's where I think the magic can be where yours looks like this and mine looks like this and they both are super awesome and amazing but not the same and that's because we are not the same,
right? That diversity is a necessary part of life. It's a necessary part of our world. It's an inherently normal part of life in our world, right? And the more we celebrate that, the less resistance we have to what we're doing.
The more we're like, this is my quirky way. And not like, gosh, I have to say it like that. You know, Kaylee mentions it like this. That's how I should explain it too. No, explain it in your own quirky way.
Like be you, right? Do not try to be me. That's not going to work well for you because you are not me, right? Just like if I tried to be you, it will not work. I just am me. And the more I let myself be me and then let my business naturally flow from that place, the less resistance I'm going to have around movement and change.
and growth and sustainability and honestly just the more easy and lovely it's gonna feel, right? Because I have created a scenario of flow that actually works with who I am and it's not perfect, right?
Like my business has things just like any business that i'm like, oh that part bleh, you know but That doesn't mean I do not feel any pressure to make my business look like someone else's. There are things that I'm like, oh I should be doing that better, right?
Like I should definitely not record my podcast episodes on the same night I'm planning to put them out but here we are and I still am recording an amazing podcast for you that is going to go live in two hours, you know, like that That's not a sustainable way for me to do this.
That's not my game plan long term. It's not my normal rhythm But it's okay that this is how i'm doing it right now This is what's currently working for my life and my week, my month, my family and so I'm embracing that and also as soon as my my new microphone comes My hope is to do some batch recording because that's actually where my own personal magic is Where I can be like, okay, that's taken care of for the next six weeks or whatever And then I know I have these cool things to show up With you hang out with you and talk to you about stuff that I have planned out really really intrinsically That's not the right word really intentionally.
This was also planned out very intentionally just recorded Very last minute. That's the difference here in part because I was really hoping I could get my microphone to work. So Anyway, this is not that short of an episode It's 10 minutes after all We are going to have my dear colleague, Jelon Burton on, Dr.
Jelon Burton on next Wednesday. So look forward to that, get excited about that. I have had one single question submitted with the Ask Me a Question form. Remember that if you don't ask questions, I can't answer those questions.
If you do ask questions, I can answer those questions. Please go to the show notes right this minute, click on the link that says literally ask me a question and put in a question. Because then I will start doing questions, Q and A episodes on Fridays, where I can really dig into questions that you have.
They'll be short, they'll be sweet, but they will be informative for you because they'll be the actual questions that you are asking. So I will see you in next week's episode. Until then, I wish you the best in your doula business magic.
Thanks for joining us for this episode of the doula tips and tips podcast. If you learned something today or had an aha moment, we'd love for you to share that on Instagram and tag us at hara doula so we can celebrate alongside you.
If you found this podcast helpful, we would so appreciate you taking a second to leave a rating and a review on your favorite podcast app that helps other doulas find us as we do this work together. This podcast is intended as educational and entertainment.
It is not medical advice or business advice. Please consult your own medical or legal team for your own needs around your health and your business. We'll see you again soon.

ASK A QUESTION!!! My plan is to start Friday Q&A (we need a new name, I know!) but first I need your questions! Submit them using the form below:

https://www.harroddoulaservices.com/ask-me-a-question

In this episode, we dive into the beautiful truth that there’s no one “right” way to run a doula business—and that’s both the magic and the overwhelm. Reflecting on the many conversations I had with doulas throughout 2024, I was reminded just how uniquely we each show up in our work. That diversity isn’t just okay—it’s essential. It’s what makes this profession vibrant, validating, and sustainable when we give ourselves permission to build a business that actually fits us. We also touch on burnout (again), because while I thought I’d covered it endlessly, turns out I haven’t—and it’s too important not to keep bringing up.

Quote from the show:

“There's not just one right way to do this, which honestly is both absolute magic and overwhelm, right? When I did all of the episodes with doulas in 2024, part of my desire was to highlight how we do it so differently. Like we are actually currently doing it very differently, right? And when we think about that, like that should be something that's really exciting, should be something that's really validating and vibrant and wonderful. We as people are not the same. And so taking some time to figure out what this needs to look like for you is vital to your sustainability. We talked on Friday about burnout which is a huge issue in the doula industry and as I was going through that and I said you know I'm putting all the the episodes that we've done on burnout and the show notes which I did I realized I only had like five and I was like I feel like I talk about this all the time but apparently apparently not but here we are so look forward to a few more burnout episodes because it is a topic that matters so much in terms of sustainability longevity the actual length and success of your business.”

Burnout Episodes:

95: Doula Burnout: What Do My Number of Working Hours Have To Do With Burnout?

https://harroddoulaservices.com/kaely-daily-podcast/doula-burnout-what-do-my-number-of-working-hours-have-to-do-with-burnout

96: Doula Burnout: How Does Self Care Play A Role In Burnout

https://harroddoulaservices.com/kaely-daily-podcast/doula-burnout-what-role-does-self-care-play-in-doula-burnout

97: Doula Burnout: How Do Doula Rates Impact Doula Burnout?

https://harroddoulaservices.com/kaely-daily-podcast/doula-burnout-how-do-doula-rates-impact-doula-burnout

98: Doula Burnout: What Role Does Trauma Play in Burnout?

https://harroddoulaservices.com/kaely-daily-podcast/doula-burnout-what-role-does-trauma-play-in-doula-burnout

164: Is This Doula Burnout?

https://harroddoulaservices.com/kaely-daily-podcast/is-this-doula-burnout

165: What Does This Doula Burnout Mean For Me?