REMIX: Going Full-Time as a Doula (and Not Losing Your Mind in the Process)

  • Speaker 1 00:04

    Welcome to doula tips and tips. This podcast is a place where we answer one question about doula work, both to support you and to help you support your clients. I'm Kaylee Harrod. I've been supporting families in this perinatal space since my oldest was born, 12, nearly 13 years ago. I am a birth and postpartum doula childbirth educator, La Leche League leader, and a doula coach. I love guiding and supporting doulas as they work out their doula business. It is a tremendous joy to be trusted in this way. Thank you for joining us on this journey.

    This episode is a repeat only because I have an upcoming workshop on planning your year out. And one of the things that so many doulas are planning is how to do doula work full time. So enjoy this episode from one of my earliest coaching clients who went full time in her doula business and is honestly still thriving two years later. At the end of the episode, you'll hear how to connect with her and that information is also in the show notes. You'll also hear information about the class and you're welcome to sign up in the show notes as well. Enjoy the episode. Welcome back to doula tips and tips. Today, I am super excited to have my doula coach student Dominique Jones with me. Dominique, I would love to hand it over to you and let you tell us who you are and how you became a doula. Sort of give us a little intro to yourself.

    Speaker 2 01:39

    OK, first, thank you, Kaylee, so much for having me on. I am super excited to join your show and to talk about your amazing coaching program. So before we get started, I will just take a minute to introduce myself. I am Dominique Jones. I am an urban mom from Washington, DC. Of three young girls, I have a five-year-old, a three-year-old, and a now 10-month-old, all girls. And I am also the founder and CEO of a birth services company called Mama, Mom's Advocate and Maternal Advisor LLC. I educate, empower, and assist families with having safe, peaceful, and joyous childbirth experiences. And I do that through my private childbirth classes, through my birth and postpartum doula services, and through lactation counseling. So that's just a little bit about me, who I am, and what I do.

    I got started with birth work after the birth of my second child. I had a doula. Her name was Jen. She was absolutely amazing. I had her for the birth of my first baby and for the birth of my second baby. And after the birth of my second baby, I realized that it was really something to the work of a doula, right? That the first time I thought, maybe it was just luck. Maybe I just had like a great experience because I got lucky. Yeah. And it was funny because when I was talking about my birthing goals and how I wanted to have an unmedicated, natural childbirth, everyone who I spoke to, like my family, my friends, they thought I was crazy. And they told me that I would be begging for an epidural or they asked me things like, well, why would you want to do that? But I just knew that I wanted to do that for me. And I don't know how, but I heard about a doula somehow. It had to be an app or a magazine because I promised you before I got pregnant or before I started my journey to motherhood, I had no clue what a doula was. Right. But I knew I wanted one once I found out I had one. And she helped me have the birth that I wanted to have. Kaylee, you won't believe this. So I was birthing in the room and Anthony and his mom and his dad was in the room too. But Anthony and his mom was kind of talking to a nurse at like the foot of the bed. And my doula was with me at the top of the bed, right? And I was just so connected with her. And his mom looked over and was like, are you pushing? And she was like, she was like, you don't have to be a bit girl because she thought that I was going to be screaming, right? But I heard her, but it was like, it didn't even register, right? I was just so- Yeah. You're just like, I can't deal with you right now. So in tune with my doula, that, you know, I was able to push her without people, you know.

    Speaker 1 04:48

    and realize I'm giving birth. Yeah, that's all right. Thank you. I love that. I love that.

    Speaker 2 04:54

    Yup. Yup. And then I did that again, something similar for my second child. Jen was there too. And it was then that I was like, this is what I want to do.

    I want to help more women look like me, change that birthing narrative so they can have more peaceful, more enjoyable, more joyous childbirth experiences. And it was kind of then that was really a pivotal, pivotal turning point for me because I had worked in education for 13 years. And all of those years, I had no clue what I wanted to do. I had a lot of skills, a lot of talent, and people were like, you're good at this and you're good at that and you're good at everything. But I felt so unfulfilled and so lost. And it was then that I was like, this is what I want to do. And that's when I started my journey.

    Speaker 1 05:42

    That's amazing, I love that. I think it's interesting because from knowing you, like you connect with people really well.

    And so I'm sure that was part of it, is people are like, you're amazing at this because you connect with people. But you're like, I mean, yeah, I can do that well. That's it right there, like, yeah, I can do it.

    Speaker 2 06:00

    that well right but this is like it was just like this this is not it and I kept saying I don't know what I want to be like that I don't know what I want to be when I grow up and I didn't know for a long time right but I am great

    Speaker 1 06:12

    with no plan for growing up. Yep.

    Speaker 2 06:16

    Fully grown, fully grown. And I had transitioned so much in that career. Like I had, you know, promotion after promotion, I had tripled my salary and it was a great job. And people just kept saying, you better not leave that good job.

    Like don't you leave that job. It was, it was great. But I was like, this is not it.

    Speaker 1 06:34

    Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's also I think just we could go down a whole rabbit trail of like doula as a second career because similar to the like, I don't know, are you sure you can do this attitude about giving birth is that like branching into this career. And I think a big part of it is people still don't really know what a doula is, you know.

    And so I mean, I take before the pandemic, I would always take a lift to births always. Well, some sort of rideshare, right. And every time the person driving would be like, what the heck is a doula? You know, so like, I would have this conversation like a few times a month, every single month, like, this is what I do. No, I'm not a midwife. No, I don't catch babies. Yes, I do go to hospitals. No, it's not only for people unmedicated, like all of those things, right. But part of it is then this like lack of imagination of how that can look, especially when you're in more of like a traditional or safe, like, work experience, right. And it's like, but this is going so well, why would you give that up?

    Speaker 2 07:45

    Yeah, but I'm so glad that I did. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

    Speaker 1 07:48

    I love that. So I love how your journey began.

    One thing that you mentioned is people like me, is part of your vision for black women especially to have this kind of support. Because this is a podcast and people don't see you, I want to highlight that that is the case, right? That you are a wonderful black woman and you are serving black women, not only black women I'm sure, but that's part of your mission, right?

    Speaker 2 08:18

    Yeah, it is, definitely is. And it's funny because for a while I was like, am I ever going to get a black client? Because I do serve, you know. Of course, everybody. I serve everyone, right? And everyone who I have served have had wonderful experiences and nothing but great things to say, which validates my work.

    But my mission is to serve black birthing families. And to help them have joyous experiences. I was really intentional when I set up my business structure. You know, my logo has a black pregnant woman with an afro. I was really intentional about weaving in my sorority colors. I'm a woman of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated. So weaving in that subtle shout out. Yes, weaving in that pink and green. I weave in that intake clause in my branding. You know, so and I was really intentional about having imagery on my website and everything that I produced that reflect black birthing families. So that is my target audience.

    And you as an entrepreneur or a professional, you understand like speaking to your audience, but also welcoming and serving other people. Right. Yeah.

    Speaker 1 09:41

    Yeah. I mean, I love that also because I think in just like birth literature, birth images, right? It's so saturated by whiteness. And so it's also just incredibly helpful to change that norm a bit, you know? And even if all of your clients were white to be like, look at all these beautiful black bodies, that is tremendous in and of itself, you know? So that's amazing.

    I love that about your brand too. Like when I first saw your logo, I was like, oh, look at all these subtleties that people might not even be like, this and this and this. Yeah. I love that intentionality though, because that is also part of what we do in doula work, right? Is this kind of like intentional step by step support that even if the person isn't like, oh, I see you did this and this and then this, you know, we are doing that in a very methodical way. And so that intentionality shows in everything about how you've done your business, which is awesome. Thank you. Yeah.

    Speaker 2 10:43

    Yeah, also really intentional about the work that I want to do. So, you know, my name is Mama, that's the name of my company, mom's advocate and internal advisor.

    I was very intentional about wanting this, wanting the work that I do to have a huge advocacy piece to it. You know, and just being intentional about where I stand in regards to birthing rights for black birthing families. So yeah.

    Speaker 1 11:09

    Yeah, which I think is enormous and a necessary and important thing. So I want to talk a little bit about where you kind of have seen yourself grow in the last couple months. I know our relationship, we haven't even met in person. We can go down this whole path that we live four blocks from each other. I know, but I feel like I know you so well.

    Yeah, we are eventually going to meet in person. But once we got connected, we initially were connected through lactation and then through doula stuff. I remember getting so excited when you were like, I'm a doula. I was like, oh, me too. Talk to me about I'm like, oh, we're not supposed to talk about this. This is a lactation meeting. So where have you seen your business kind of grow and evolve in the last couple of months? And what was helpful about being in the program with the other two ladies that were in there? And how has that sort of accelerated some of what you've seen?

    Speaker 2 12:12

    Yeah. So first let me say that, and I think I touched on it earlier, but I honestly do believe that I was called to do this work, that, you know, I'm a Christian. I believe that God created me to do this work. And a lot of what I do and a lot of what I hear from my customers, from my clients is, you know, you were a godsend. You were such a blessing. You are my angel. And it's just like validating like, okay. And I say that to say that over the last two to three months, things have just been kind of falling in line, right?

    So my baby Ava is older now, and you know, I can focus more on birth work, which is different because I started, you know, with this work when I was still working in education. So, and then when the pandemic hit, I started, but then I got pregnant. I had a loss and I got pregnant again. I had a baby that was, you know, taking care of a newborn. So now this year is like the year that I'm really focused on like making a thriving, successful business. And things have just been falling in line, including your membership, right? Your, your coaching program. So I started off, you know, the year with intentionality and focus and clear goals around what I wanted to do. And since I joined your program, I've had some first, right? Which are really exciting. So I had my first in-person lactation client, which went amazing.

    Speaker 1 13:45

    Awesome

    Speaker 2 13:47

    Yes, I've signed my first big postpartum doula contract and you helped me tremendously through a very hard birthing experience, which was supporting a family through a stillbirth. So that was my first, you know, I hope that, you know, I never have to do it again, but I do feel like I have the skills to be able to navigate that space with care if I had to do it again.

    So I think a big part of where I started with your coaching program was kind of like, I don't want to say like uncertain, like that wavering confidence. That's, that's what it was. That's a good way to say it. Yeah. A lot of like, you know, I don't know, am I enough? I don't know if I could do this. I don't know. Yeah. Even though I've had all of the trainings and if you are, so many certifications. Yeah. So many certifications. And if you are a black birth worker, you probably can relate to that, like imposter syndrome and feeling like whether or not you're enough. So I am now, that's another thing that I got since I've been with you. I am now a donor certified doula birth doula. Yes. Yes. I am also a certified alama certified childbirth educator. I'm also a certified breastfeeding specialist. I'm also a certified mental health first aid trainer. And a lot of other, I'm also now a pal advocate, which is lost. But I still felt like I don't know if I'm enough. And I definitely felt that way walking into the support for the stillbirth, but having you to call on to help prepare me emotionally and to reassure my confidence that I am enough to go into that space to support that family.

    And then just trying to, and also talking through what I could expect when I was there was super helpful. I've been in coaching programs before and my coaches were all amazing. However, they weren't birth coaches, right? So there was like a gap, a disconnect between really being able to relate to where I am and really being able to guide me to where I want to be. A lot of what we hear if you are focused on development, you hear you want to find someone who is where you want to be. And you Kaylee are definitely where I want to be. You're where I want to be. You have so much experience, so much knowledge you are giving beyond anything that I could have asked for. You are confident. You have the things that I want to have. You have your podcasts. You supported clients in different situations. You do birth and postpartum and lactation. So you are the coach for me, right? You can guide me through what I'm going through and you can speak to it from a point of experience. So that has been tremendously helpful for me. And equally said, I feel like you can relate to my wavering confidence, right?

    Speaker 1 17:33

    right? Yeah. So that's so many times. Yeah. Yeah.

    Well, and I, it's funny because as I like started this journey of doula coaching, I was like, this is doula-ing, but I'm doula-ing the doulas, right? And doula is a verb. We use that. We use that as a verb. But it's funny because even as you're talking, I'm like, okay, do not do not take away the fact that Dominique did this awesome work of her. Like you're the one who really showed up for your clients and for yourself and for your business. But it goes so far to have someone behind you to be like, I am doing this, right? Right. And this, this is how you expect it to look. And it's so funny to me, like even just hearing you describe it. I'm like, it is so much like birth, like so many times when someone's like makes eye contact with you, like, are you certain I can do this? And you're like, oh, I know you can. And they're like, okay, all right, that's what I need to hear. You know, now I will do it. It's not you, you know, like I didn't do anything to your business. I didn't. Yeah. I mean, I, I referred one client who did not hire you. So I didn't even send you clients, right? But, but part of it is that like ability to walk in what you want to do because you know, someone else believes you can do it. And it takes a little just like the tiniest bit of that imposter syndrome away, you know, and we all need that. Like I still firmly think we need a doula for every single part of our life.

    Speaker 2 19:07

    We definitely need someone who believes in us. Yeah.

    Speaker 1 19:10

    Yeah, yeah, a hundred percent. So I also want to hear, or I want my listeners to hear what your dreams are for your business because I've heard a little bit of this and it's exciting to me where you want to go.

    And I think it's also just like a wonderful thing to get to dream a little bit about where we're headed as business owners and as doulas. What would you dream for this to look like in a year from now?

    Speaker 2 19:36

    Yeah, I'm going to talk on that, but I do want to move back to that belief piece again, because I do think that it's important for your listeners to hear this because as business owners, especially new business owners, we are really careful and mindful about what we invest in. But I will say, and if you have those people close to you who are supporting you, maybe your partner, your husband, your mom, your sister, your best friend, they will support you, but it's nothing like another entrepreneur to believe in you, because I feel like a lot of times they're supporting you, but they still have that doubt, right?

    That I don't really know. Maybe you should go and get a nine to five, you know, that doubt, right? But having someone who is walking in the space to be able to turn to for guidance is invaluable. So I just wanted to touch on that. Yeah, as far as my goals, so I want to have steady business, right? I said that this was my first year that I'm really focused on growing a thriving business and I'm not getting pregnant again. I am.

    Speaker 1 20:54

    One goal is to not be pregnant. Yeah, I can't tell Anthony.

    Speaker 2 20:57

    No, nope, nope. That guy.

    Speaker 1 21:00

    separate rooms. Yeah.

    Speaker 2 21:03

    Back out, brother.

    Speaker 1 21:06

    I love that. But you're like, for the sake of the business, buddy. Yes, yes, yes. Back at home.

    Speaker 2 21:12

    up. And anyone who's listening to this who knows me knows I love babies and secretly I will have all the babies in the world if I didn't.

    Speaker 1 21:23

    that you are with babies all the time outside of your own babies.

    Speaker 2 21:30

    But I want to have steady business, I want to have, you know, three birthing clients a month, I want to have steady lactation work, I want to have a good amount of postpartum work my goal is like 12 to 15 hours a week for postpartum clients. In addition to that, I want to get experience serving different types of families, as well as different type of birthing experiences.

    So I will say, I do have business secured through like late summer so that makes me so happy.

    Speaker 1 22:06

    This dream is happening.

    Speaker 2 22:08

    happening. It is happening. It is happening.

    Um, so, and I want to have my, um, one demand childbirth classes. Yep. Created. Um, eventually I do want to kind of move into like, an agency and coaching, but that's kind of long term long term goals, right? So I want to really dig deep into every aspect of my business and know it very, very well, um, to be able to then transition over to hiring doulas and lactation professionals and childbirth educators to carry on the work.

    Speaker 1 22:51

    Yeah, that's huge too, because we, I mean, along going back to like your mission of supporting Black families, especially, we need more Black-owned agencies, you know, like that's because that furthers that mission in such a specific and tangible way. But also, if you're hiring Black doulas, you're also furthering that part of the profession, which is tremendous, you know, so that's super exciting.

    Speaker 2 23:17

    really what I want to do, have a greater impact. Because there's only so many families that I can serve. So once I reach my capacity, I want to start hiring out so we can reach more Black people.

    Speaker 1 23:29

    Yeah. And it is exciting to think about like the wider net that you can have in terms of influence when you're doing at lactation, you're doing postpartum, you're doing birth, you're doing childbirth ed, because when you're just in one of those, there's only so much you can do in terms of reach, you know, because it's like, I remember at some point someone saying like, do you want your business to grow?

    And I'm like, do I want to go to more births? I'm not sure. I was like, I don't know if I can. But it is, it is a way to sort of look at this business as like a growing expansive living organism, right? That like, right now, this is sort of the edge of what I'm imagining. And also, it can grow beyond that, which I think is just awesome. So yeah.

    Speaker 2 24:18

    And, you know, one of the good things about the pandemic was the access to like virtual support, right? So that allows me to be able to serve a little bit more families, you know, through virtual birth and postpartum doula support as well as telehealth through lactation. However, there's still like a cap, there's still a limit, right? Especially when you are focused on providing like quality care and, you know, really supporting your clients and getting to know them and really showing up for them in a way that you will want someone to show up for you.

    And I think one of the greatest like benefits of me and my services is that I'm on a childbirth journey too, right? So I just had a baby. So I know how I wanted professionals to show up for me and I'm really intentional about showing up for them in that way.

    Speaker 1 25:19

    Yeah, yeah. You also have three little people who are very clear about their desires for you in their life as well. Yes.

    Speaker 2 25:29

    you know, one of the great things about your coaching program was the tools and the resources that you have around structure and organization and, you know, just planning to be able to have sustainable work, you know, so the batching of the content for the social media, the spreadsheet that you have for tracking the clients and the births, because I don't have that many clients, but I will say they do start to kind of be like, oh, who was what, what, what, what, who's what, what did I do?

    Speaker 1 25:58

    Are you at that hospital? That is right, right? Yeah, yeah.

    Speaker 2 26:02

    Yeah. So having some organization and some systems to be able to work efficiently is critical.

    Speaker 1 26:09

    Yeah. I mean, that was one portion of this as I was like imagining what it would look like, that I was like, oh, I know this is helpful because I had to make all of this up as I went along. But it's so incredibly important.

    It's important as a business owner to not be like, I have a million things in my head and that's the only place they live. Yeah. So I was like, oh, I'm going to give you all the resources because I do not want you to have to do what I did to make these up.

    Speaker 2 26:40

    Yeah. And then, um, you know, the, the greatest thing about, I don't want to say that I can't probably keep saying the greatest, the greatest, the greatest, cause it's all great.

    But another great thing about your program is the community, right? So being able to connect with the other, um, birth workers in the group and learn from and grow with them and, you know, just build relationships, build community is, it's amazing.

    Speaker 1 27:06

    Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's the part that I'm most excited to see expand this year, you know, as more and more people are in the program to get to like, watch you guys also support each other is pretty awesome.

    So, yeah. So, most of our listeners are newer doulas. And I would love to hear if you could give one piece of advice to a new doula, what would it be? You can do too, if there's more than one.

    Speaker 2 27:35

    Yeah, you know, I would say get you a doula for your business, right?

    Speaker 1 27:44

    I did not pay Dominique to come on and tell you to hire me.

    Speaker 2 27:49

    Honestly, you know, I say this to like every pregnant person that I come in contact with.

    Speaker 1 27:57

    you

    Speaker 2 27:57

    Yeah. My one piece of advice for you would be to hire a doula.

    And I always say it doesn't have to be me, but I know I have never and I, you know, God willing will never birth without a doula. And I think you hit the nail on the head that, you know, coaching for your business is like having a doula. And I think that we could all use a doula. Right. In a business doula. A business doula. Yeah, a business doula. A coach. With experience. And you have a wealth of knowledge and experience.

    Speaker 1 28:37

    Yeah, yeah, I appreciate that. So one thing that I'm gonna put in the show notes is how you can connect with Dominique.

    But Dominique, what is your favorite way to connect with people that wanna meet you or learn more about your services?

    Speaker 2 28:53

    Yeah, you can just send me a DM on Instagram or Facebook. I am at mama, m-a-m-a, birth services on all of the social platforms. So just send me a DM. That's the best way.

    Speaker 1 29:09

    Amazing. I'll make sure that your Instagram and Facebook are in the show notes. I am very excited that you came on today to talk to us.

    And I'm so surprised that we didn't get any of your special visitors. It's cool.

    Speaker 2 29:23

    like, do not come down here and do not call mommy. I will be up in a little bit, okay? And I said, did you hear me?

    Speaker 1 29:33

    They say, okay, mama.

    Okay, mama, we got it.

    We got it.

    We're staying up.

    Awesome.

    Well, enjoy the rest of your day.

    For everyone listening, we will be back soon with another episode.

    Until then, I wish you well-informed, consent-filled doula business experiences.

    Thanks for joining us for this episode of the doula tips and tits podcast.

    If you learned something today or had an aha moment, we'd love for you to share that on Instagram and tag us at hara doula so we can celebrate alongside you.

    If you found this podcast helpful, we would so appreciate you taking a second to leave a rating and a review on your favorite podcast app.

    That helps other doulas find us as we do this work together.

    This podcast is intended as educational and entertainment.

    It is not medical advice or business advice.

    Please consult your own medical or legal team for your own needs around your health and your business.

    We'll see you again soon.

ASK A QUESTION!!! My plan is to start Friday Q&A (we need a new name, I know!) but first I need your questions! Submit them using the form below:

https://www.harroddoulaservices.com/ask-me-a-question

Going full-time as a doula? Yeah—it’s a lot. Life doesn’t stop just because you’re trying to build a business that actually works. In this replay, I’m talking with one of my first ever coaching students, Dominique Jones, about what it took to find her rhythm in the chaos. She’s real, she’s brilliant, and her story might sound a lot like yours.

Quote from the show:

“"Having someone who believes in us... as business owners, especially new business owners, we are really careful and mindful about what we invest in. But I will say, and if you have those people close to you who are supporting you, maybe your partner, your husband, your mom, your sister, your best friend, they will support you, but it's nothing like another entrepreneur to believe in you. That I don't really know. Maybe you should go and get a nine to five, you know, that doubt, right? But having someone who is walking in the space to be able to turn to for guidance is invaluable. So I just wanted to touch on that. Yeah, as far as my goals, so I want to have steady business, right? I said that this was my first year that I'm really focused on growing a thriving business and I'm not getting pregnant again.”

Meet Dominique Jones of MAMA Birth Services

Dominique Jones is an Urban mom from Washington, DC. She has three young girls and is also the founder and CEO of a birth services company called MAMA, mom's advocate and maternal advisor LLC. She educates, empowers and assists families with having safe, peaceful and joyous childbirth experiences through childbirth education, postpartum doula services and lactation counseling. 

CONNECT with Dominique on Instagram


https://www.instagram.com/mamabirthservices/

CONNECT with Kaely on TikTok or  Instagram

https://www.tiktok.com/@doulacoach

https://www.instagram.com/Harroddoula/

Previous
Previous

How I Stopped Running My Doula Business Like a Squirrel (and Started Acting Like a CEO)

Next
Next

How to Build a Doula Biz That Actually Pays You Back with Lisa Vee