10 Lessons From My First 10 Births (Part 1 of 5)
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00:04
Welcome to doula Tips and Tits. This podcast is a place where we answer one question about doula work, both to support you and to help you support your clients. I'm Kaylee Harrod. I've been supporting families in this perinatal space since my oldest was born 12 nearly 13 years ago. I am a birth and postpartum doula childbirth educator, lovely cheerleader, and a doula coach. I love guiding and supporting doulas as they work out their doula business, it is a tremendous joy to be trusted in this way. Thank you for joining us on this journey.
00:39
Hello, and welcome back. Today we are diving into a new series, that is called 10 lessons from my first 10 births. So I want to dive into some of the things that I learned really early on as a doula and save you the pain of learning them in the same way that I did, hopefully. So my plan is to do two, maybe three in each episode, depending on how long they are, and kind of how much detail we go into. And so that is what you have to look forward to for the next number of episodes. So I'm gonna start with number one, my first lesson that I feel like I learned really early on, is eat. And I just want to talk a little bit about that. And I know that I've talked about like, you know, I just had an episode a few episodes ago about what should do is eat and what does that look like? And how do you do that. But here's the thing, truly, the thing that will make you feel the crappiest after a birth is not eating while you're there.
01:49
I mean, I guess I should say the thing that makes me feel crappiest, because maybe that's not the thing for you. Right. But honestly, the times that I have not prioritized eating. While I was with a client, I have felt like absolute shit afterwards, like truly terrible. I want to tell you about one birth in particular, there was one birth that I was like, Okay, I'm really hungry. I'm really hungry. I'm really hungry. And I was kind of looking at the clock, like, when should I you know, when should I say like, Okay, I think I'm gonna go grab a snack real quick or whatever. And
02:25
then my client enter transition. And I was just like, oh, shoot, like, I can't now I can't leave. And so I was starving, like, truly like felt like lightheaded because I hadn't eaten. And so a midwife came in, and was sitting with my client in the bathroom permanent. And I'm, like, snarfing, down a few bites of a muffin. At the time, I was sort of like, everyone's probably judging me, you know, like, I had all these negative thoughts in my head. And then I'm like, Why did I neglect this need for so long, like, I could have taken a few bites of this muffin before right now when I feel like I might die if I don't eat, you know. But in that moment, I was like, I'm not really mentally present with my client. Because I'm so hungry, I haven't taken care of my like, most basic bodily functions in order to be able to really be present and supportive to my client. So you know, we think about like being on an airplane.
03:28
And they always say, and I'll hear your oxygen masks. If you're flying with a child or someone who needs assistance, then put your own oxygen mask on first. Because if you try to put theirs on and yours is not on, ultimately, you could pass out while trying to put theirs on them, then neither of you have them on, right. And so it's not because they're like, oh, you know, you definitely want to save yourself first. It's because they're saying like you physically are unable to put the mask on the child or the person that you're caring for if your mask is not on because you're going to also not have oxygen, right. And so that's the same kind of concept in terms of self care in the midst of a birth is that you really have to care for yourself in order to be present well for your client. Okay, so number one, eat absolutely always eat when you're at a birth if you're with a client for a long time, even if it's just snacks now this of course goes back to have some really good snacks with you. But also don't feel bad taking like a lunch break or a dinner break or something like that and actually eating a real meal. That is important to do. Okay, number two, right along the same lines of take care of yourself and your body is pee. Now, I have talked in another episode about stopping and going pee before you join
05:00
Your client if you're going to their hospital, because oftentimes, we neglect our own bodily functions in the midst of a birth experience, right. And one thing that I see sometimes is that a doula will arrive, put their stuff down. Or I guess I hear about it more than I see it since I'm not usually with clients and their their doula.
05:27
And then run and fill up their water bottle or run and put their stuff in the fridge or run and go to the bathroom. And the reality is that your client usually is so relieved to finally have your support, that they are not necessarily super jazzed about you running off and doing whatever you need to do. Now they're not against you getting water or peeing or whatever. But they don't love the fact that you're doing it, the second you arrived to them. So it is 1,000% better, to stop on your way into the hospital, and pee or fill your water bottle up before you join them. Now, on the other side, you have got to take care of your body. So you need to eat you need to drink, you need to pee and poop etc. In the midst of being with a client. Now, it's hard to do because you have to leave the room typically, they it's really frowned upon to go to the bathroom in the clients bathroom, that's not a good idea because you're potentially sharing germs etc. Don't do that unless you absolutely have to, or you're being told to do it by the staff.
06:38
But don't ignore the fact that you have to go to the bathroom. And honestly, I think eat and pee go together because I'm a person that's like, Hey, I'm gonna run I go to the bathroom. And I like grab my water bottle, I grab a snack, I eat the snack on the way to the bathroom, fill my water bottle up on my way back so that I'm kind of checking a bunch of boxes at one time so I don't have to leave the room multiple times. Okay, so those are your first two of the 10 lessons get excited about the other eight.
07:13
If you have lessons to add to this, I would love to hear from you. Over on Instagram as the easiest way to connect with me at Herat doula. I also have some workshops coming up some free resources coming up. So if you'd like to be added to my newsletter, where you hear all about the new episodes that are coming out, and also the other cool and free things that I'm doing in my business, I would love to have you added and that link is in the show notes. So I will see you in the next episode.
07:52
Thanks for joining us for this episode of the doula Tips and Tits podcast. If you learned something today or had an aha moment we'd love for you to share that on Instagram and tag us at Harrod doula, so we can celebrate alongside you. If you found this podcast helpful. We would so appreciate you taking a second to leave a rating and review on your favorite podcast app that helps other doulas find us as we do this work together. This podcast is intended as educational and entertainment it is not medical advice or business advice. Please consult your own medical or legal team for your own needs around your health and your business. We'll see you again soon.
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Being a doula comes with trials and errors. Today we are diving into some tips I learned at the beginning of my doula career. Stay tuned for the next couple of episodes because we will be discussing 10 tips I learned in my first 10 births.
Quote from the show:
“And they always say, and I'll hear your oxygen masks. If you're flying with a child or someone who needs assistance, then put your own oxygen mask on first. Because if you try to put theirs on and yours is not on, ultimately, you could pass out while trying to put theirs on them, then neither of you have them on, right. And so it's not because they're like, oh, you know, you definitely want to save yourself first. It's because they're saying like you physically are unable to put the mask on the child or the person that you're caring for if your mask is not on because you're going to also not have oxygen, right. And so that's the same kind of concept in terms of self care in the midst of a birth is that you really have to care for yourself in order to be present well for your client. Okay, so number one, eat absolutely always eat when you're at a birth if you're with a client for a long time, even if it's just snacks now this of course goes back to have some really good snacks with you.”
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Kaely Daily is produced by Kaely Harrod of Harrod Doula Services
It is sponsored by The Birth Prep Blueprint Childbirth Class
Music by Madirfan: Hidden Place on Pixabay
